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Necromonger
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November 18 1990 (27 year old)
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 Forum index » TSGK General » Fun Stuff
Thread for jokes?
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Plasmo_TSGK
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PostPosted: Sat Mar 05, 2011 06:55    Post subject:  

The following is a little something my crazy coworker introduced me to. These aren't his words or it never was his joke, but it's close enough:

The finals of the National Poetry Contest last year came down to two finalists. One was a University of Alabama Law School graduate from an upper crust family; well-bred, well-connected, and all that goes with it. The other finalist was a redneck from Auburn University in Alabama.

The rules of the contest required each finalist to compose a four-line poem in one minute or less, and the poem had to contain the word "Timbuktu."

The Duke graduate went first. About thirty seconds after the clock started, he jumped up and recited the following poem:

"Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked the dusty caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination-Timbuktu."

The audience went wild! How they wondered could the redneck top that?

The clock started again and the redneck sat in silent thought. Finally, in the last few seconds, he jumped up and recited:

"Tim and me, a-huntin' went.
Met three girls in a pop-up tent.
They was three, we was two,
So I bucked one and Timbuktu."

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Zog Ecosse


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PostPosted: Sat May 28, 2011 09:07    Post subject:  

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way ~

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.

Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Miss O. Needeep They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deap Schitt married her cousin Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.

Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chick N. Schitt.

Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.

The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.

The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.

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gtamike_TSGK
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 12, 2011 00:59    Post subject:  

Item Stats

100% Melee Weapons
100% Explosives
100% Skill decrease
97% Damage increase
75% Sudden urge to camp
70% Speed
50% Luck
3% Armour
1% Barter (high DLC prices)


Laughing Laughing Laughing
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mr.Jingles


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 10:17    Post subject:  

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mr.Jingles


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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2012 10:52    Post subject:  

Cosy workplace
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mr.Jingles


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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2012 14:04    Post subject:  

just do it
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